A HAIRY SITUATION

I’m a sucker for a ginger nut
To dunk into me cuppa;
Or Jamaican ginger cake –
A slice or two for supper

An ice-cold ginger beer
Gives me so much pleasure;
And I believe Ed Sheeran
Is a national treasure…

I even like Prince Harry
(I’m really not that fussy…) –
But I just can’t feel the love
For my ginger pussy!

When she sits upon my lap
No matter what I wear,
Will very soon be covered
In an inch of ginger hair…

And she only has to walk past
Or brush against a wall –
And I’m choking on the fluffy air
And spewing a fur-ball!

It seems every time I cook
And everything I taste –
Has a ginger hair or two
Lurking on the plate

When friends come for a meal
We try and make a joke –
When they free their teeth of ginger hair
Before they start to choke

They sit there looking stunned;
Shifting in the chair –
‘At least it’s from a cat!’ We say –
‘It’s not a pubic hair!’

I really don’t have ‘gingerism’-
Love the colour and the taste;
But affection for a ginger cat –
To me is so misplaced…

So don’t get a cat that’s ginger!
Get one that doesn’t shed !
Like one of those weird hairless ones –
Get one of those instead!